R.I.P Our sweet darling old man, Bobby, a true gentleman of the equine world

RIP BOBBY CHOPS 1986 - June 24th 2011 (rising 26yrs)

Photo of bobby as a baby, you can tell by his mother, who he took after .......

Bobby as a foal

Please find time to look through Bobbys' slide show, I would love to share the life we had together with you, it only has a hundred photos so please also look through the album where there are hundreds more, I will put the videos on another time:

Album:

CLICK HERE

Slideshow:

CLICK HERE

Bobby had been loved by every one that had the privilage in knowing or owning him. He had only a few owners including myself in his years, his breeder owned him twice! Each person that owned Bobby was touched by an amazing horse.He was a spoilt horse all his life. Each of us will always tell you, he is the best horse we have ever had. His breeder / blacksmith whom I see often, adores Bobby, he trained him and bred him and wanted him back when he saw I had him lol. He always said "He was the best driving horse he has ever known, you could take him down the motorway and he wouldn't blink an eye", his owner previous to me, also said "Bobby is the best horse she has ever had" on her own horsey memoirs. This too, is the same for me, Bobby IS trully the best horse I have ever had. Each of us were touched by the true flawless gentleman he was. I had an amazing bond with Bobby. I took him when his last owner didn't know what to do with him for the best- a hard choice for her to make. He had been in a field on his own for a couple of years (like me, it was hard to let him go). He would have been ideal for my family , he had such lovely character in his face, I wanted to spoil him for the rest of his days.I agreed to have him for the rest of his life which in turn would be a semi retirement life, then fully a year ago. That was 1st July 2007, four years ago.  He didn't half fill the horse trailer up the big blob, but he walked in straight from the field. I quickly restricted his grazing and put him on a slow diet.

Me and Bobby August 2010

I dont know what it is, I have been lucky to have had many horses , but there was something special about Bobby for me, immediately. I loved him straight away, it was just his person, his life, the respect for his age,  how he wouldn't have had them extra four years with me, the list goes on.

Bobby and his last owner, how gorgeous eh, very posh here

As mentioned in many of my other blog posts over this past year or so, I have noticed Bobby getting older and older, not in mind but in body. He has slowed down tremendously over the past so many months. I did state on one blog somewhere, I would have to consider his future as he slowed so much.He didn't really care for daily horsey life, he just wanted to rest a lot and be on his own. I knew I would have to make that decision at some point in the next year. I just didn't want to, I wasn't ready to let him go, if I could ease and make his life easier to keep him, to let him relax and be fully retired, then that's what I owed him. He had got worse over the last few months, very slow in everything. However, sometimes, he would trot like a spring chicken from the top of the field if he saw my car, he would scream at the top of his voice until you gave him attention, he was very unique and very vocal, he was amazing. I loved so deeply how he shouted me, yes other horses have shouted me lots of times and Ziggy already does but Bobbys' shout could probably be heard all over Poulton and just continued until I decided either to bring him in or give him a treat. He was so bloody great.

Bobby

This is very difficult for me to write but I must share Bobby with you. He was an amazing beautiful horse.

23rd June, the day before

People that know me, know the 23rd of June is my birthday. We as a family have had a difficult time over the last few days. It has been our first fathers day without our pops, it has been the fisrt anniversary of his death, he died on my birthday. Then the day after, Bobby dies.

April 2008

The usual evening shift at the stables:

I turn up at the stables around five this evening. Bobby per usual, like clockwork has already got to his standing point in the field by the electric fencing waiting for me as he spots my car on the lane turning up. What a bloody gent eh!! I get out of the car and leave it at my gates as usual. As soon as I get my body out of the car, there he is screaming his head off. I dont know what it is but this time he was going baserk. He had only been put out that morning, he was stood there with his fly mask and rug looking all silly screaming his head off. As I got nearer to him by the yard I laughed my head off, I said to him "Bobby you dafty pants, you would think you hadn't seen me for a week, you have only been out since this morning" !!! I just couldn't stop laughing at him, he was just being over the top. I let him out in the morning to have peace and quiet to himself in the field (next doors horses in their field for company, then again, Bobby liked his own company lol). I then say to my dad "have you heard him, you would think I had turfed him out for a week". Anyway, before we get the young ones sorted, Alfie doing some more grown up work and Ziggy being razzed around by Jess lol, I went and gave Bobby a chocolate biscuit. That was him happy and he went back up the field.  He knows, if he gets a treat quickly, he's staying out, if he has to wait a little while, he knows he's coming in. I have been bringing him in more and more, he is out one day, in the next and so on. He comes in and after his snack he immediately goes to sleep flat out for hours. This has also been a little sign lately.

Feb 2008

Anyway, my birthday was good though painful, especially driving past the hospital, seeing me in that spot walking for my shift as if I was looking down over myself, seeing myself take that phone call. It was painful driving past there a couple of times that day.

Bobby 24 years old

24th June 2011.The day Bobby left us for rainbow bridge to be with Honey and my friends mare Beauty and our dog Missy (I hope they see Jenny there too).

Yesterday was going great considering all the pain suffered over the few previous days beforehand, visiting the grave and getting over the birthday hurdle of memories. I went and got my hair done at 10am yesterday, I was feeling happier that I was getting more organised for the family wedding in two weeks. I asked the hairdresser to give me that Vidal Sassoon look for when I walk out of there lol, I also, believe it or not, was brave enough to say, "please can you only take an inch ish off, or what ever mimimum to tidy it up". She was brilliant! She did a great job! I popped to my mums afterwards and my mum loved it, she said wow its brilliant, you look so much younger. My brother gave me a cheesy smile and said wow you look younger.... so that says it all ..... she did a brill job!!! My son said he thought I was someone else when I opened the door at home. That was a great £13 spent, yep, just £13. I highly reccomend her by the way, she has her hairdressers in Bispham Market, Bispham Village. Anyway, I was feeling much happier. I stayed in with my daughters as knew there was no rush to get to the yard as all the neds were out.

Me and Bobby 18th June 2011

This next part, I can't believe!

How Bobby managed this I dont know. But to me, it was a true meaning of fate. Why, out of any time yesterday, did he manage to pick minutes after I turn up at the yard? Unbelievable. I will never know how he managed it.

Bobby 2009

I arrive at the yard around 4.45pm ish. As I pull up, I see the neds running at the top of the field, I see Bobby and shout him. The other two were razzing around in the jungle, being pilacs like usual lol. Bobby then runs. Not like him in the slightest as everything is slow mo with Bobby chops. Anyway, I get a slice of bread each for them and walk up the field to check them as normal. Bobby looked sick, the usual signs head hanging really low, he was just on his own after the run and looked like a robot. I walk briskly towards him after giving the other two their slice. I speak to him from a distance and he doesn't move. Not like him. The other two were being silly, Bobby was just stood there, really sorry for himself. I approach him after shooing the others away. He is breathless, his breathing staggered, has drops of bloody running down his nose and quite wobbly looking (faint like-human). I go as fast as I can to the yard, get his headcollar, say to my dad "do you know where my phone is" he gives me the phone and knew by looking at me something was wrong, I said "I have to get Bobby in the paddock quick, he hasn't got long left, he's going to have a heart attack". My dad is not really taking it in what I said at this point. I take a lunge whip to shoo the boys away get Bobbys headcollar on and so sadly lead him and prompt him and encourage him to come with me. It was the most most most painful thing ever to see, he was so wobbly but just wanted to be with me, wanted to be at peace. He did so briliantly for me, walking all the way from the top of the field (2 acres), it was so very very hard for him, he just did it for me, I dont know how he did it, he wasn't able, his body was telling him to drop, he was so wobbly, he just did it for me, he just knew. I've phoned the vet at this point whilst leading him, encouraging him into the sand paddock, I dont want him to fall on anything hard, I say "come on bobby chops, come on gorgeous boy", he comes into the sand paddock with me, struggling so hard. I quickly take his headcollar rug and mask off, I wipe him speaking to him all the time and tell him it will be alright Bobby, I now have to leave his side and move a few feet away from him as he's ready to go down, he wobbles so horribly to the fence as if for support, his legs are all over the place, he cant stay up any longer, I keep talking to him, he falls like a lead weight to the ground frashes his legs by the paddock fence smashing the fence, I am laying next to his head stroking him, stroking his head and nose and eyes whilst he is undergoing his heart attack, I keep speaking to him, as soon as he fell to the ground I broke down with him, I was brave for him trying to encourage him out of the field. As soon as he went down and had his attack I couldn't cope and my heart broke with him, it was very quick, once he was down. I stroked and stroked him speaking to him all the time, Bobby had gone and now his bodily nerves were thrashing, giving the illusion he was still with us. Though I knew he had gone and this was his body leaving too, I continued to speak to him and stroke him and wipe him down with the damp cloth to keep him cool. He left us. I was still waiting for the vet. Sadly I had to wait half an hour. I sat with him by his head on the grass by the paddock fence where his head lay. I continued to speak to him and stroke him, looking in disbelief as to what had just happened. At his head side, I was a bit at  peace with him, as it started to rain, I had to leave him to go and get his turnout to put over him, I didn't want him getting wet and cold. I wanted him to be dignified at all times. I put his rug over him and sat with him in the rain, my dad bringing cups of tea to me whilst I wait. Moving away from Bobby to go and get his rug, to see him from the other angle, his legs, his body weight on the opposite side of the paddock, was too much, just too much. Surely big animals shouldn't look like that, so horrible.

Bobby and myself 2009

The vet arrived, I told him he died half an hour ago, he had a heart attack. He did some checks, gums, nostrils, tummy, internal. He agreed he died of a heart attack, with what I told him and he knew Bobby. He phoned the removal company and said, you wont like to be here when they arrive, I told him I know, I'm going home. It was bad enough to contemplate what I had just gone through with him, I didn't want to see him move like that!!! The vet stayed with me a short while in the rain having a cup of tea, talking about Bobby, he said he was in very good condition for his age, that it was lovely I was with him, that Bobby would have gone quickly, that there was nothing more we could have done to make it more comfortable for him. He also said it was very lucky how I managed to get him out of the field because something like that really spooks other horses. The removal company arranged for Bobby to be picked up an hour later depending on what time they arrived from Cheshire. I left instructions that he was to be cremated, I didn't want his ashes. (Too morbid).

May 2009

Crying all the way home, I dont think my mind was actually registering what had happened. My car took me home on auto mode. I got home and looked at some of his photos. I was in a quiet state. I didn't want to speak to anyone. I have gone through so much pain these past couple of years, i really dont know how much more I can cope with. I'm drowning in all my sorrow. With family things and losing Honey in March and now beautiful Bobs too. Its all sudden and un controllable the way they have all left. I wanted to pick Bobbys' ending, I wanted it more dignified, no pain, I wanted to plan a nice day for him, I wanted to spend quality time knowing it was his last day with me. I didn't want him leaving me like that. It is so painful. My old boy.

Bobby 2010

I go to bed, still quiet, still not wanting to talk about anything. Half past one in the morning, I wake up,  I go downstairs, I'm figiting all the time, tossing and turning in bed, I can't stop thinking about Bobby. I then feel sorry for myself. Its a why why why. Thinking, I wonder if I will have a heart attack with all the pain i'm going through. The loss is too much to bear. I stay awake until 5.30am, I have found some photographs and sort them for a file. I still have hundreds more and videos to find. I am so glad I take lots of photos. They are symbols that show you Bobby was here, we shared his life.

May 2011 sleepy head

My friend by text said "he was so amazing, grief is the price you pay for love and Bob is worth every tear". WOW! What a powerful statement.

Dec 2010

I am in agony over all my tears. I can't believe how it all happened. I can't believe Bobby managed to wait until I arrived and within minutes etc he struggled to do as I asked (so hard to watch him, agonisingly breaking my heart every step) and then left me. How did that happen? Would he have been able to hold on if I was twenty minutes later? I can't believe it. I am so so so so glad, I could be with Bobby chops for his last moments on earth, I am so glad he felt my tears, heart, touch and voice until the end. I just can't believe he has gone, the blackmsmith came the day before, he was Bobby chops, now he isn't here, how can that happen so quickly.

x This is where he stood waiting for me beautiful boy x

My last photo taken of Bobby, below, on my birthday 23rd June 2011, the day before he left unexpectedly for rainbow bridge

The last ever photo taken of my Bobby boy June 23rd 2011

RIP sweet darling Bobby, my life with horses will never be the same, you leaving me this way has done something so powerfully unexpected to me, this has taken its toll.I'm in so much pain. xxx